Assimilate (2019)

SEPTEMBER 23, 2020

GENRE: ALIEN
SOURCE: STREAMING (NETFLIX)

There are only four official versions of Invasion of the Body Snatchers, released in 1956, 1978, 1993, and 2007 (the less said about that last one, the better), but there are countless "homages" that take its basic "pod person" plot and do their best to not get sued. Assimilate is one such film, and while it is hardly a classic and nothing you absolutely need to track down, it hits all the beats and gets the job done, which is all you can really ask for when the story has been done so many times and - if you're smart enough to consider it beforehand - realize that an independent film such as this isn't going to be able to go all out with "end of the world" scenarios like the big budgeted studio efforts.

But again, not being sued is a priority regardless of the budget, so your mileage will vary depending on how much you connect to what they're specifically bringing to the table. Here, it's the usual small midwestern town stuff, but the focus is on a trio of teenagers, making it come off like the Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew trying to figure out what's going on and then survive. Granted, some of that element was already covered in The Faculty, but their parents were largely MIA (Elijah Wood's were the only ones we met, right?) and the town seemingly lacked a police force. Here, not only do we meet all sorts of folks in their town (their parents, the priest, the cops, the neighbors, other students, etc) but the aliens are incredibly efficient and turning them all. By the halfway point there are only four humans left, it seems, which actually ramps up the tension quite a bit because our three heroes are pretty equal, no obvious survivor (or obvious goner) among them.

The fourth human is my man Cam Gigandet from Pandorum and Priest, who I haven't seen in much since. He is the town's deputy, and has a resigned kind of bond with the heroes (who have a Youtube channel where they goof off, so you get the idea he is occasionally required to tell them to get off someone's property or whatever, but knows they're good/harmless kids). As their lone adult ally, you're of course waiting for the moment where he too is turned, so that they can lose all hope (spoiler ahead) but... he doesn't! I mean, he doesn't make it, either, but he goes out protecting them, and has no problem believing their story. Even before he has his own proof (an alien tries to clone him), he allows "Nancy Drew" (actually Andi Matichak from the Halloween revival) to leave her home despite her "parents" (pod folk) demanding that she stay, as if he knows something is up and that she'd be safer elsewhere. So he's set up as a generic kind of character, but they zig where most zag, and I liked that.

The priest, on the other hand, might as well have been an alien as soon as we met him. Creepy weirdo.

I also liked that it kept the "found footage"-y element to a minimum. As our boys are Youtubers, they are filming a lot and one of them even has a little button cam that would provide an easy way for the filmmakers to get around the "why are they still filming?" aspect and even free up the character for more action, but it's largely backgrounded once everything goes to hell, used only for the odd moment here and there (and no full sequences, at least not that I can recall). I mean I know it's 2020 and no one's demanding the POV style anymore, but you can never be too sure - after all, the most blatant Halloween knockoff was Offerings, and that came out over a decade later. And, for what it's ironically worth, has there been a pod person found footage movie? I can't recall one. Untapped territory!

Plus, all the kids were likable, unlike real Youtubers. Matichak is always a charming presence, and the two guys feel like genuine small town kids trying to stave off their boring existence with their show. One of them clearly has a dud home life (no dad, mom has a revolving bedroom door), and we can easily infer he spends most of his time with the other one thanks to that one's mom assuming he will be staying there for dinner (i.e. "as usual"). It's almost a shame that one of them is offed with like a half hour to go, as their brotherly bond was welcoming for a modern horror movie where most teens spend their screentime bickering. Also, they're not both pining after Matichak - there's no love triangle! Wooo!

Weirdly, it has the same pro-social media ending as #Alive, with (spoiler) people using comments sections and the like to let rescuers - and each other - know that not all hope was lost and that there were survivors scattered around. In retrospect, it's kind of a blessing that Don Siegel was forced to add a happy ending to the 1956 version, because it was rather silly to think it could be contained so quickly and most versions since go with the more realistic "it spreads to the rest of the world" idea (The Faculty is a curious one since it leaves it up to interpretation; it's TOO happy and thus suspicious). Here we get a sort of mix - yeah, it's everywhere, but they haven't figured out how to shut down the internet yet, so the survivors can stay in touch. Thanks to the internet, we can pour one out for scenes where someone on a CB radio keeps asking "is anyone out there?" from now on, bless.

Dodgy CGI for the alien parasites and some dragginess here and there aside, this was a pretty enjoyable entry in this sub-genre. It's suspenseful, occasionally gross (the pod people are formed nude and look like corpses, so if you're a necrophile you'll find lots to love), and thankfully wastes almost no time getting to the poddin'. And it's got what may be one of the best "they're a pod person now!" reveals ever, the details of which I won't spoil here but I'll say it involves a person who is seemingly better off as an alien. Also I was glad to see a "small town America" setting that was ACTUALLY a small American town (in Mississippi, to be specific) as opposed to Canada or Bulgaria like most movies of this type. Best of all: nothing as stupid as this scene happens. Good work all around, folks.

What say you?

Tweet