JULY 7, 2020
GENRE: GIALLO
SOURCE: BLU-RAY (OWN COLLECTION)
It's interesting that only one of the three films on Vinegar Syndrome's Forgotten Gialli collection is actually from Italy, since they're the ones who were responsible for the sub-genre (some even say if it's not Italian it's not even a giallo, which I don't agree with, but I guess they will be furious about this). The Police Are Blundering In The Dark is that one exception, a true Italian production (the other two were Spanish films) and, of the three, the one where Dario Argento's influence was most apparent. It's also the fastest paced of the lot, offering a murder in the first few minutes while the other two on the set took their time getting to the black gloved shenanigans.
It also has the best title, though it sadly has little to do with the movie, as the police don't really factor into it at all. The line comes from a newspaper headline about a handful of murders that have occurred over the past 18 months (the one in the opening sequence being the latest), and surfaces again when one of the film's heroes explains why he was trying to solve the case, but that's it. Since so many gialli feature heavy police activity (in Argento's films, where they were often co-leads with the innocent hero whose name had to be cleared) it's kind of funny that one of the few to use "Police" in their title has about as much police activity as a later Friday the 13th sequel, i.e. none.
Instead, it has one of the horniest heroes ever, which meant I spent most of the movie laughing at his caddish ways. His girlfriend is the movie's second victim, who is using his car to travel to a modeling shoot (all of the victims are models) and has to stop somewhere along the way when the car breaks down. She calls him to let him know and ask him to come help, but he's already in bed with another woman! When he finally decides to come help her (she's already dead, alas) he ends up at the artist's home, at which point the artist's maid throws herself at him. This leads to a hilarious sequence where they get interrupted and she tells him to come to her room, which he can't find so he is kind of just wandering around the house looking for yet another woman to cheat on his girlfriend with. He never manages to find her, but as a consolation prize he ends up sleeping with the artist's niece for good measure. All while trying to find his girlfriend! It's amazing.
As for the mystery, it's inadvertently made "difficult" by what I assume was a mistake in the opening kill. As is often the case, we only see the arm for the most part, swinging into frame toward the victim, but at one point the stuntman/camera operator/whoever playing the arm lunged a little too far and offered three frames of the side of his face. Later on, when we meet the artist, one could conceivably think they were the same person, and since he is confined to a wheelchair, it seems like it could be setting up a twist (he's faking his invalid state!). But no, it's just a bad mistake from the director/editor, and my (very close) second pick was the guy it turned out to be anyway.
It's also not particularly complicated or involved - he just wants to kill women, I guess. No lengthy childhood flashbacks to explain the trauma is offered, nor is the particular hatred toward models explained. Just a crazy guy, and that's that. And the camerawork is equally rudimentary - apart from a few long (still) shots where an entire scene plays out without a cut, there's nothing notable about any of it, no flourishes during the murders or vivid imagery. That said, the screenwriter goes for some mild Four Flies on Grey Velvet-esque silliness with the late reveal that the artist is working on a device that can produce an image of what someone is thinking about, which of course helps identify the killer. The hero ultimately doesn't really do anything himself, amusingly; you can cut him out of the movie entirely and it would play out pretty much the same way.
But then you'd be denied what might be my favorite scene! He goes to the hotel where his girlfriend was staying, and asks for the clerk to go wake her up. We know she's dead already, so watching the guy go check the empty room then come back would be pointless. Instead, we stick with the hero, who sits down in the lobby and watches the hotel's maid endlessly wipe down a table, rolling her eyes at this guy's intrusion. It's like a full 60 seconds that offers absolutely nothing, but I found it delightful - it kind of reminded me of the bit in The Prowler where the bored deputy just pretends to go look for the sheriff until enough time has passed to tell the caller he isn't in. So pointless/random, but so good.
Unlike the other films on the set, there's no historian commentary for this one - which makes sense given how obscure the movie is (this is apparently its first official home video release, on any format, ever). Instead, there's an audio essay that runs about 10 minutes, quickly covering the highlights of its participants' careers and offering some perspective on the film's merits and placement within the genre. It's nothing particularly essential, but worth a listen to get your money's worth, and I took extra enjoyment since the writer shares my opinion that the film is enjoyable without doing anything notable. It came out in 1975, so the sub-genre had already been well established (and if you include that year's Deep Red, gone through most of its most well known classics, in retrospect), but feels kind of underwhelming, so it kind of reminded me of those later '80s slashers like Iced and Berserker where they were just going through the expected motions for a sub-genre that was already losing its appeal. That said I still enjoyed it, perhaps because The Killer is One of Thirteen (the second film from the set that I watched) was kind of a snooze so it just looked good in comparison? Either way, I had a good time with this set and look forward to Volume 2, though all of them are definitely "for completists only" as opposed to must-see entries.
What say you?
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