The Rage (2007)

OCTOBER 19, 2007

GENRE: PREDATOR, COMEDIC, CRAP, MAD SCIENTIST
SOURCE: THEATRICAL (SCREAMEST LA)

A few months ago, I watched an advanced copy of The Rage, which was directed by Robert Kurtzman (the K in KNB). I didn’t like it at all, but I assumed the film was unfinished due to the terrible visual effects (the guy was one third of the greatest effects company of all time!), and it seemed the type of film that would benefit from a big crowd and maybe a few beers. So I gave it another chance at Screamfest, with crowd and said beers (well, one beer, before the movie. Close enough).

Sadly, it seemed even WORSE on the big screen. Not only did the film’s horrid acting and ridiculously overlong finale seem more troublesome, but the effects looked even WORSE on the big screen. What I saw WAS indeed finished; the effects just suck.

See, I can accept a bad CG effect or two in a film, but The Rage literally goes out of its way to make the filmmakers/VFX team look inept. A character dies via a pipe in the backside, and CG poop flies out of the pipe’s open end. Another character is beheaded, and excessive CG blood spews out of it for far longer than necessary. Why “add” to your effects when it just makes the movie look more amateurish? We know the guy is dead, why ruin the scene by adding in another, unnecessary visual gag? And why is the blood CG?

And it’s amazing how stunningly bad Erin Brown (aka Misty Mundae) is in this film. She turned in a great performance in the short In The Wall, which showed at the festival a few days before, but here she is simply atrocious. She constantly looks like she’s laughing when she’s supposed to be scared, and her delivery is awkward, making even simple “Come on!” type lines sound forced. Reggie Bannister fares no better in a small cameo, making a truly wretched Phantasm joke that no one laughed at.

The film also seemingly goes on forever. There’s a moment where you think it’s about to end, as the lab where the finale takes place catches fire, heading toward some oxygen tanks, but there’s at least another 10 minutes of additional banality before the damn lab explodes and we are allowed to go on our merry way.

Can’t say I didn’t give the movie a chance.

What say you?