Paranormal Entity (2009)

JANUARY 6, 2010

GENRE: GHOST, HAUNTED HOUSE
SOURCE: DVD (STORE RENTAL)

“You know this is Paranormal ENTITY, right? Not Activity?” Ah, the Blockbuster staff, always trying to keep me from watching complete shit. But I laughed and explained to the girl* that that was precisely why I was renting the movie, as I had to know what The Asylum was going to do with a movie that had a budget less than that of their usual productions. While their nonsense like Transmorphers and The Day The Earth Stopped couldn’t possibly compete with its big-screen brethren, Paranormal Entity’s namesake film only cost 11,000 dollars itself, which means that for the first time, the excuse “we didn’t have as much money” couldn’t possibly apply (not that I ever really give that argument much weight anyway; a case I’ve made several times in the past). In fact, it’s theoretically possible that this film had a HIGHER budget than the real one.

So I guess we have definitive proof that The Asylum just plain sucks. I can’t blame the director, writer, or actors for this snoozefest, because they opted not to give them any credit (and the film has no IMDb page), so I’ll chalk it up to their lazy approach to filmmaking. Unlike most of the films they ripoff, they must have actually had a copy of PA to work from (or they shot this thing last month after pooling their money together to send someone to the theater to see it), because several of the “scares” are stolen directly from Oren Peli’s film - the loud thumping footsteps, the broken photo frame directly over someone’s face, sheets being pulled away, sleepwalking outside in the middle of the night, etc.

What they DON’T have, however, are likable characters. Some folks thought Micah was a bit of a douche, but I thought he was pretty normal, and Katie was cute/not dumb (people who thought they should just leave apparently didn’t pay attention - the ghost was following her all her life). But these folks (a mother and two teenage children played by 25 year olds) just constantly bicker, and it’s not until the final 2 minutes of the movie that someone (a fourth character - a paranormal investigator who looks and acts exactly like the one in PA) points out that the ghost will “probably” follow them if they leave, so until then you’re just saying “Why the fuck aren’t they leaving?” (unless the film’s gotta-be-illegal swipes from PA make you think that it’s the same deal and the ghost is after them before that point anyway).

They also don’t have Peli’s skill at setting up the layout of the house, or his ability to create dread. I never quite got where any of the rooms were in relation to another, and it wasn’t until late in the film that I even realized that there was a 2nd floor. Worse, the main kid (who we only see like twice) has set up at LEAST four cameras (Micah had one), which further deflates things. Katie might walk downstairs while we watch Micah sleep, and our minds make up what’s happening. This movie simply switches to another one of his cameras, and the character does nothing interesting. So it’s doubly stupid.

Also, what the fuck do these people DO for a living? They never leave the house, nor do they seem to have work-from-home jobs or anything of that nature. But the dude can afford four nice cameras somehow. Then again, maybe the family saved money from not buying things for their rooms. The mother’s has a nice little piece of wall art and a canopy bed, but the sister’s room is a bed and a dresser and a crucifix, and that’s it. No posters or photos, no clothing on the floor, nothing. At one point the brother opens her dresser and in the top drawer is her journal and a scarf. Maybe I was wrong, maybe they DID spend less than Peli did for his film.

And it’s poorly made, no shock there. There’s a scene in which the sister claims she is getting ready for bed when you can clearly see that it’s still broad daylight outside. The faux improvisation usually just means that the actors swear at each other, and Mr. Anonymous Movie Director blows his wad by giving us a scrawl at the top of the film that informs us that the brother killed himself after being accused of killing (and raping, though I’m not sure where the hell that came from) his sister and the paranormal investigator. So you wait around 80 minutes for them to get to that point. I know Blair Witch had the “this is the found footage” thing, but they didn’t go into specifics, and we don’t know for sure that any of them are dead anyway.

Plus it’s simply not scary or interesting. Something falls off the wall or breaks (off screen), and the guy films it while his sister and mother try to explain what happened. There’s a decent/creepy moment when the mother appears standing before the guy’s bed after slashing her wrists, but that’s about it. Usually it’s just stuff like the (literally) TEN MINUTE scene of the guy walking around shooting close-ups of the footprints that the ghost made (out of their father’s ashes - which is sort of badass).

Extras on the disc? Fuck, this thing doesn’t even have a goddamn scene selection. Pressing the menu button during the film will simply pause it for a second, and when the film ends it just goes into an endless loop of blank screens that run for four seconds before starting over (and once you’re in this loop, there appears to be no way to get back to the movie without shutting down your player entirely and starting it up again). Looking at all of the evidence, I would have to guess that Paramount’s unusually quick release of Paranormal Activity on DVD and the film’s shocking box office success caught them off guard, so they scraped this thing together over the course of a week or two so that they could have it in stores on the same day. And thus, things like a DVD menu, credits, an IMDb page, and a decent movie were simply not in the cards.

What say you?

*Same girl, with whom my previous longest conversation was “Find everything you were looking for?”, was taken aback by my haircut. She was the third person of the day who I never actually talk to that was surprised by this. Is this normal for people? I never notice things like that.

HorrorBlips: vote it up!

50 comments:

  1. I liked this film much better than Paranormal Activity. The suspence grew as the film went on and the performances were much better and the characters much more relatable (brother + sister + widowed mother). Micah and Kate were sloppy douche bags. And unlike Activity, we get some blood and titties!

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  2. I have a hard-on for anything Asylum-made. They KNOW they make bad movies and have fun with it. You get that by reading their blog. I try to watch as many as I can, but they do tend to put them out pretty quickly. Just when I think I'm catching up on all their movies, I blink and they have 4 more released.

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  3. "as long as we get blood and titties!" I fucking hate horror fans.

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  4. Hahahaha, people with good points always make me giggle.

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  5. fuk dis shit dis move was hella bad loved it way beta thn paranormal i mean damm i got hella scared well i m a gurl dnt give a shit cuz dat was scary nd will watch it by myself...

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  6. Yo dawg! You goin to hollyweird!

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  7. this thing sucked ass! PA was SO much better. I mean seriously, they don't show what the hell Dr. Lauren and Samantha were doing prior to the final scene, yet Thomas' camera (which never left his side through the whole movie) is suddenly laying next to dead Dr Lauren... she is 'floating' by the corner of the bed and all covered in blood which was smeared all over her body, 3 distinct nail slices into her upper left chest and some sort of gash in her belly. If this was the rape scene, why the fuck was she wearing panties? Then the camera drops and she dies, 2 thumps and the camera gets picked up again to show her all cleaned up, no blood smears, a SINGLE slice in her chest... LAME! Glad I rented this and didn't pay full price at the theater!

    If you're gonna copycat a movie style (or an entire movie idea as this one did) at least make it worth the publics time. This just proved that The Asylum don't give a shit about it's customers or the quality of film that they produce.

    If I owned a video store, I'd refuse to pawn this piece of shit to my customers!

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  8. I work at Blockbuster so I thought it was hilarious that you mentioned what we HAVE to say to customers. You have no idea how many people come back demanding their money back. Not too fun...I haven't seen it, it didn't look good at all. And after reading your blog I never will! Thanks for saving me the time!

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  9. I do like Paranormal ENTITY alot more than paranormal activity, because it is more suspensful. And all of the sick people that are commenting on here saying you liked it because you saw her brests , you are pathedic, and you are probly some 21 year old that can not get any...

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  10. There's absolutely no comparison! PA is way better than PE! I feel like i wasted an hour of my life watching this crap and actually feel much stoopider for it!

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  11. sam had nice tits

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  12. This movie was HORRIBLE!! Definitely had some bumps and jumps but nothing that I hadn't already seen in PA.

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  13. I laughed. I cried at it's stupidity. I did not scream, nor quake in terror. I think I was more terrified by Clifford the Big Red Dog goes to Hollywood than I was by this movie.

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  14. PA is sooooo much better than PE!!! The characters in PE are not as convincing as the ones in PA. And the so called 'scare' scenes in PE made me laugh

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  15. Paranormal Activity was so
    much better. It had better actors and a better story line. If I know anything about demons, it's that they don't rape people. I've never in my life heard of that, and they copied everything in P.A. Which had three alternate endings, that could beat the entire P.E film. Note to director: stop copying other peoples suff and be original for once.

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  16. After reading this blog I am so thankful. I love movies like Paranormal Actvity which portray real life things but after reading this I won't watch this movie. I LOVED Paranormal Activity, it's one of my favorite movies :)

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  17. I dont get the point of even making these movies, wouldn they rather at least TRY to make something original? The ghost of abraham lincoln is back and hes pissed! Sounds like a better premise then just ripping someone else off..

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  18. obergij:
    they did that in an episode of Supernatural season 5

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  19. Haha supernatural reference made me laugh

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  20. I liked this one better just for the fact that it had more suspence. I mean yes the plot was wierd, and how the characters had bad acting. But I thought it scared the hell out of me so i thought it was good.

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  21. It had it's moments, but I enjoyed it. PA was better, and there were quite a few amateur mistakes, but I was entertained, nonetheless.

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  22. I'm a horror fan and I don't give a shit about titties. Anyone posting about it being a plus has got to be a moronic teenager with his dick in his hand. Boobs in movies are a dime a dozen.

    Just watched PE and thought it had a lot of the same mistakes that PA had, with the addition of the obvious fact that nobody lived in that house. A teenager's room without dirty clothes everywhere and posters all over the wall? Come on. I've got a teenager and her room in itself is a horror. But I digress...

    I hated PA, but saw it after too much hype. I found the characters annoying, didn't think there were enough really scary moments, and like PE, thought there were too many discussions between the protagonists that should have happened that didn't (dad's spilled ashes in PE, ouija board on fire in PA). I think PE had more freaky bumps in the night (liked the scene with the bell and the guy running away, then the pounding on the door, also liked the footprints in dad's ashes) but other than that everything was a rip-off of a few movies. But all in all, I'm glad I saw it, it had its moments. But in horror, even a bad movie is good.

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  23. Samantha had the perfect tits.

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  24. I liked PE way more than PA, PE had a greater sence of suspence to it! And for whom ever made the comment about demons not raping people well they do and they are called "INCUBUS" Google it. Its super creepy! Over PE scared me especially the last seen when Sam was naked in mid air.

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  25. This movie is really sick!! Why make fun on t.v. about a girl being raped? Don't you know some girls watching this movie was really raped in their live and don't like seeing such shit!! Really cruel!! Don't you wanna find a real job maybe!!?? Good to have imagination but being attacked and pinned down in your bed by ivisible shit, dude, that realy happens! It happened to me so many times!! Do you see me making a movie without thinking it over or see other movies first to get some ideas...? Oh hell noooo!! And why give the movie away in the beginning without it starting first? Like the input but I agree, it could have been so much better if you used your own imagination and set everything up like in as if it was the real thing! PA I thought it was really true but with this I laughed and was reminded about PA! I ate dinner while checking out this movie, while with PA I was drinking brandy to relax!!
    No way, the movie was ok for me but the rape part, now that was not nice at all!! And what's up with that chick? If you wana be naked so much that you even want your brother close to you while being naked I'm sure they have openings at some porn movie site especially for groupies!! LMFAO ppl, you made a mockery of girls who's lives was destroyed by being raped, no respect man means you don't respect yourself! I love paranormal movies and shit like that cause I knw it happens but this was just bullshit and too convenient!! Even I knew what was gonna happen next! I'm sure you have much more intelligence than this!

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    Replies
    1. wow. thats a lot. have you not seen "boys dont cry"? or how bout "girl interrupted"? why is it okay to portray death, murder and hauntings and rape is off limits? Come now. Go read a book, maybe one called Lucky, then turn on the news. This is out there always. Have you really been pinned down by something invisible? I am sorry for all your struggle, but really, your missing the point of this horrid, dumb, brain depleting movie.

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  26. I would argue that pretty much any bad thing that happens in a horror movie (including, you know, being MURDERED) happens to people for real all the time. So it's bad to have rape in a movie because some unfortunate girls (and men, for the record) were raped for real, but it's OK to have stabbings, torture, etc?

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  27. Samantha was sexy as hell. I want her to comment on this page just so I can have the sense of being near her huge boobs.

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  28. The part about saying at the "last 2 minutes" that the ghost will follow them if they leave isn't true. When Samantha and her mom went to the hotel in the middle of the movie, the ghost followed them there which in return should of lead the audience to the fact that the ghost WOULD follow them wherever they go. Its not just at the end of the movie. The brother was accused of raping his sister because she was raped at the end of the movie before she was killed and possibly in the bathtub scene too. She did have bruises on her thighs which should indicate that she was raped I'm not all to sure though. Even though it seemed to be a re-make of Paranormal Activity, it was still pretty interesting. The movies do have there differences which is good. Samantha's room isn't even worth criticizing. Shes 19 not 16 and there isn't something that says that 19 year old girls have to have posters and clothes on the floor. I generally thought the movie was interesting.

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  29. all u ppl who thin paranormal activity is better than paranormal entity are insane. PA is a total waste of time hardly anything happens at all in the whole movie and it takes halfway through the movie for the damn door to move!!! can anyone say queer? that movie put me to sleep. PE is so much more exciting and u will not sleep. small things happen at first which builds up rly nicely wen stranger things start happening. not rly a boring moment in the whole movie. if u havent seen it u totally shld.

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  30. whether it's loosely based on a true story or not, the footage is FAKE. Thomas Finley is played by Shane Van Dyke, Samantha Finley is played by Erin Marie Hogan, and the mom (forgot her name) is played by Fia Perera. And there are definitely a few mistake made in the shooting that make it obviously fake, like when Thomas's mom called his cell from the hotel, it has the same ringtone as the house phone, acceptable, yes, HOWEVER, it was on standby, no one was actually calling at the time of the shooting.

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  31. First All Of You Guys Are Lame Because PA Was Fucking S U C K E D !! Paranormal Entity Was More Better && Scarier ; Point Blank !!

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  32. I could tell this movie was gonna be a fail in the first 2 minutes. Why does this guy have about $10k in video camera equipment? Why is he running "8 hour batteries" and not just plugging them into power? Why is everything so clean? Sorry Entity...Activity wins.

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  33. To everyone criticizing the house eing so clean, here is my take on it. Assuming for a moment that it was "real", it makes sense to me. The brother said at the very beginning that he was making a documentary, so assuming that someone in my house would be filming every moment of our lives for others to view, I would get the house prepped in advance, get rid of the clutter, and make sure everything was always neat and tidy, especially where the stationary cameras are going to be. As for Sam's room, I would want to put away anything personal or potentially embarassing if there was going to be filming, so that explains the sparse room. The only real mistake I felt they made was the dresser drawer, and how empty it was. Would it have been that difficult for the person playing Sam to grab a pile of her own clothes to fill the drawers, or the ones that would be opened on camera at the very least.

    Also someone commented on Sam saying she was getting ready for bed while it was still light out, and that being very fake. That didnt seem unusual to me at all, as I am an insomniac and generally go to "bed" after the sun comes up. In her case she is "attacked" at night and therefore woken up several times, so he is probably a) very tired from no restful sleep so is going to bed early, or b)too scared to sleep at night and feels a sense of comfort and protection by going to bed while it is light out. Neither seem unreasonable to me.

    Having said that I watched this not knowing anything about it, Asylum films, or PA, and was seriously creeped out. I thought the missing credits, bad acting, and very raw editing feel only added to the feeling of it being a true story. People in real life are not natural actors, especially when frightened. I did not watch it all the way through the long spaces of black screens to the end where it said it was made by Asylum films, I only discovered that later after googling it. At the time when I watched it I was left questioning whether it was a movie or actually real.

    The only other part that struck a "cheesy" chord with me aside from the empty drawers was the fact that Sam liked to be barely dressed all the time. That seems abnormal in a house with older teens of the opposite sex, but I am an only child so what do I know? At the very least if something was attacking me in my sleep I would not only NOT want to sleep there again but would wear as many articles of clothing as I could possibly stand to try to protect myself. But again, that is just me, maybe it is really hot where they live. Who knows.

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  34. I actually thought the movie was pretty good. I mean compared to Paranormal Activity then Paranormal Entity doesn't have shit but still. It kept me interested and then it scared the shit out of me when the bitch was standing in his room. I could have done with more explanation on what happened. And the ending was fucking weird. But yus i liked it ^_^

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  35. Bitch gets raped by supposed demon, not once, but twice. That makes it worth it.

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  36. I didn't really like PA or PE. I guess i should watch PA again since its been awhile since I watched it.They just weren't that scary. Also whoever is talking about her being naked you are so immature.

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  37. BAHAHAHAHA I'm watching this movie right now and it's HILARIOUS!!!!

    Honestly, the only reason I'm watching this movie is for the titties...

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  38. Haha guy above me I'm using my iPod and finding her titties on safari and saving them on here :D
    But that's only because they are amazingly nice;; almost perfect

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  39. Paranormal Activity was HORRIBLE. Paranormal Entity is way better! Wtf are all you virgins talking about?! The fact that paranormal activity had absolutely no scary scenes, nor did it have any parts that made you jump. Paranormal Entity has everything a good scary movie should have; It has blood, a shit load of suspense, somewhat good acting, and a whole mess of parts that make you say "holy balls, wtf is happening", and "F That!!!!". If these so called, "critics" are just talking shit on PE because of the tiny flaws that shouldn't be noticed, get a life. There is nothing wrong with PE. Paranormal Entity > Paranormal Activity. Hands down.

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  40. Lotta idiots around here.

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  41. load of garbage!! i want my 80 minutes back!!!

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  42. this movie was good considering what they had to work with.the footprints thing was fuckin cool

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  43. I would not say it's the best movie of the ones I've seen, but certainly one of the few which really memorable. In general, the film was shot in a pseudo-documentary genre me intrigued. I watched avidly, because there is always present sense of belonging to what is happening on the screen. After watching for a while I can not get out of prostration, get used to real life. For me the film worth seeing.

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  44. The movie was good in my eyes; had a build up of suspense that kept my eyes glued to the screen. The last 2-3 minutes scared the living shit out of me. I watched this movie via Netflix one night, thinking it was just some cheap version of PA (which it kinda is)and now I'm extremely paranoid; not sure why because I'm a guy and the Incubus demon wouldn't want anything to do with me but still. What I remember most were Samantha's screams followed by the sound of her gurgling as though being choked, then something (not sure if it was Thomas or the demon) picking up the camera and showing her lifeless body. Safe to say I'm scarred for a while.

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  45. Paranormal Entity was so much better than Paranormal Activity. Unlike in PA, PE was a lot more suspenseful and had a lot more going on. In PA 1 and 2, nothing happened until the middle of the freaking movie, and what did happen, wasn't scary.

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  46. wow i feel fucking bad bout watching this stupid shit! i mean really? sigh....wow n my brother in law thinks it real to =.=** no after reading something n then this it not n it was lame when he did walk out the door n wast ten minutes of my time for nothing that he finds out there then goes back n sees a ladder brought down like really? sigh....at least i bet a lot of us would put some effort into making a better film then this piece of crappy ass film...nothing was good i mean PA 3 was a lot better then this one n that one made me jump more than this one =.=** like really? =.=*** i wish i had read this before seeing the movie....o well..n the part wear she had shown tits really? how stupid can guys get bout that stuff.....? =.=******

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  47. I have a feeling that every post saying that Paranormal Entity is the better movie is written by the Asylum staff for a laugh. I hate to categorize every poster here because it's unfair, but most defenders of PE come off kind of mentally challenged.

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  48. Watched and liked both PA and PE, and I would really not compare them together. When PA was released it created a hype because it was the first movie with this kind of execution (both technically and dramatically and PA was obviously riding PA's wave and was clearly meant to be released after PA...therefore, they can't be put in one page in that sense.

    One thing that bothered me with PE is the fact that all the characters seemed to have no life and/or friends for that matter, they just hang around their house or go out together. I would have wanted to see one of the characters at least calling a friend, that would help us relate better to the character.

    One other thing that bothered me was how the characters reacted the day after the each encounter happened, I mean after the first one they sat down and talked about it even though it was silly, but after that, when things got really scary, they said nothing...no reaction!?

    I wasn't pleased with the final scene. It is one thing to leave bits and parts of the movie for the audience's imagination, but up until now I could not think of any explanation of what happened to the paranormal expert and where each character was around the house and why!! Anyway, the final scene and gagging voices all together at the end were great and hauntingly scary.

    One final advise for the director: if they are to make it look like a rape scene then the girl should not be in panties or at least don't take the camera down there..it doesn't make sense that a demon has stripped the girl naked but kept her panties on :P

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