Lady Frankenstein

JULY 5, 2007

GENRE: MAD SCIENTIST, MONSTER
SOURCE: DVD (BUDGET PACK!)

Despite (estimated) millions of readers, so far I have gotten very few reader recommendations for films to watch. Come on folks, I have almost totally cleaned out all the options at my 2 local blockbusters! There’s only so many “Netflix recommends!” movies I can stand.

One such film was Lady Frankenstein. It was an easy sell; I already owned the damn thing thanks to my beloved Budget set. And, I was told it featured yet another woman seducing a mentally challenged character, much like Devil Times Five and Funeral Home (the fact that all 3 films are on the same disc speaks volumes about the twisted genius of Mill Creek). Sold!

The movie is essentially a remake of Frankenstein for one half and then a Skinemax slasher for the 2nd half. The monster kills Frank, and his daughter decides to make another creatures while the original one tries to kill everyone else involved with his rebirth. The makeup on the monster is pretty good, though he looks a bit like the Metaluna Mutant from This Island Earth. And despite the obvious liberties, there's a great deal of the standard Frankenstein elements - the monster rampaging around, villagers with pickaxes and torches... there’s even a recreation of the girl by the lake scene, but now she’s “of age” (read: nude).

You know, to be honest, turning Frankenstein into a slasher isn’t the worst idea, but it would probably be done better without such a low budget. How low, you might ask? ROGER FUCKING CORMAN had to come in to save the film by giving them more money. Look, if your movie can only be completed by receiving financial support from Roger Corman, you’re beyond help.

But it’s still entertaining. The lead chick is hot and you get to see her naked, which automatically gives the film at least a C+. And she’s not just naked; she seduces a retarded man (and saying “You actually DO understand, what’s going on, don’t you?” while she does it. Nice, movie.) in order to use his body for her experiment. The fact that she actually goes to ‘completion’ before having the guy knocked out makes this movie a must-see. Then later, he gets his comeuppance (I guess) by killing her as they make love in the middle of a burning castle. It’s the finest and possibly most extreme ‘hate fuck’ ever committed to celluloid.

If you plan on seeing this masterpiece, I urge you to watch a regular copy, and not the Mill Creek version. Perhaps it’s like that all the time, but many times the music drowns out the dialogue, a common problem on these DVDs. With potboiler dialogue like “One day, you’re going to tell me the wrong thing at the right time” to be enjoyed, you won’t want to risk missing a single word!

What say you?

13 comments:

  1. ok: recommendations:

    YOU HAVE TO WATCH MURDER- SET- PIECES WHICH IS NOT ABOUT CHESS, AS I THOUGHT. I am stressing to you that you HAVE TO REVIEW THIS MONSTROSITY OF A MOVIE. Since I am a tard, I bought it, and you can borrow it. I will send it to you. Please please please.

    Also:

    Eraserhead

    Prison of the Psychotic Damned (which I haven't watched yet but will soon)

    The Incredible Melting Man (Jeff will let you borrow it).

    Zombie Cop

    Pinocchio's Revenge

    Rumpelstiltskin

    Jack Frost 2

    Are you only reviewing movies you haven't seen? I forget now and don't feel like going back to check. If not, Terrorvision

    Slayer

    Unhinged

    Girls Nite Out

    Die You Zombie Bastards

    Brain Damage

    Dario Argento's Trauma

    Ok I'm done. As one of your millions of readers I suggest you watch at least one of these and vindicate me.




    Sadly I like most of these :(

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  2. I spoke today of MSP! God awful piece of shit, it.

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  3. Okay, so obviously I liked it a little more than you did. :)

    I'm glad you took the time to watch this one. I really thought that the brought-to-life scene for the first creature was one of the better such set-pieces I've seen in a Frankenstein film, despite the admitted goofiness of the creature design. And this is the only Frankenstein subgenre flick I've seen where the monster's ugliness is explained by having his FACE CATCH ON FIRE! That's gotta be worth something. :)

    I thought that despite the low budget this looked like an expensive flick most of the time. I loved it. I loved Carl's character, I loved Tania's perversity, I loved the motivations for creating the second monster, I loved Hargitay and Fux. Nothing but love.

    And actually, if you re-watch as I did (in slow motion, about a dozen times...er, just kidding) I think you'll find that Tania reaches "completion" AS THE RETARDED GUY DIES.

    Now THAT'S entertainment!
    :)


    PS--Watch Messiah of Evil. Also on the budget pack, and absolutely fantastic.

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  4. OMG, Kolleen! I just realized you have Pinnochio's Revenge on your list there.

    I LOVE THAT MOVIE! And every time I tell someone they need to watch it, they get all smirky and condescending as soon as I mention the title. Then I have to get violent. :)

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  5. Oh yeah I saw the description for Messiah of Evil and put it high on my 'budget priority' list.

    i dug LF, but yeah, not as much as you. certainly "actually" better than many of the budget films.

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  6. man i suggest all those movies and all you can say is you referenced MSP?? Whatever

    Zombie Nation is another good (bad) one.

    Scott, you and I would get along fantastically. Messiah of Evil and Pinnochio's Revenge-- a perfect combo.

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  7. Oh for the love of...

    Eraserhead - Seen
    Prison - Not Available
    Melting Man - Not Available
    Zombie Cop - Not Available
    Pinocchio - Already in Queue
    Rumpelstiltskin - ADDED
    Jack Frost 2 - Seen
    Slayer - ADDED
    Unhinged - ADDED
    Die You Zombie - ADDED
    Brain Damage - Already in Queue
    Trauma - Already in Queue

    HAPPY??!?!?!? :)

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  8. Yes! I am happy!!! Thankkk yoooou!

    (Also:
    Prison - Netflix, or I can send it
    Melting Man - Jeff can send it
    Zombie Cop - netflix (on a double disc with something else))

    I look forward to these reviews!

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  9. FOR GOD'S SAKE

    The House That Dripped Blood
    The Torture Garden

    so you can see some good anthology movies and some British stuff

    also

    Bloody Murder

    because I hate you and think this might be worse than Dark Fields (maybe)

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  10. Is it Scream Bloody Murder (2003)? Because strangely that is at the top of my queue and I have no recollection of ever adding it in the first place...

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  11. No. I mean I guess it's British title is "Scream Bloody Murder" but the 2003 movie is a different one. In the US it's just "Bloody Murder" Confusion, I know.

    THIS MOVIE IS ABOUT SUMMER CAMP COUNCILORS AND A GUY WITH A HOCKEY MASK!

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  12. Half the fun of reading your reviews is finding out about films I'd never heard of before. Giving you ideas on films to watch and review, especially one's I've seen....well, that takes some of that enjoyment out of the page.

    But still I can't resist...

    1. Side FX (heard it's crap but know a couple of cute actresses here in Austin that were in it.)

    2. Chopping Mall (Kelli Maroney AND Barbara Crampton!)

    3. Ghoulies IV (saw this at the store today and though HUH??? Looks on par with Troll 2, if that)

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  13. 1. I'll add that one...

    2. Oh I discovered Chopping Mall as a young lad and remain a fan, its actually the subject of one of my cartoon episodes (they go to the mall to buy Chopping Mall and get trapped inside). I actually live like 3 blocks from the mall it was filmed at... I never see Mary Woronov OR killer robots there though.

    3. I havent seen the first 3, Ill be lost!

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